On Energy and Losing It
The more I journal and also go back to read previous entries, the more I realize that energy (having it, losing it, searching for it, earning it) is top of mind more than it isn't.
I first wrote about energy in a post on My Daily Practice last year, but still find myself continuing to refine the impact and purpose of it in my life. All roads seem to lead back to energy, and both the positive benefits of it’s cultivation, and negative impact of it’s absence.
Key energy drivers for me today include
Getting 7-8 hours of sleep each night
Primarily plant-based diet and no alcohol
2-3 resistance training sessions each week plus a long bike ride or two
Spending time with interesting or inspirational content and avoiding the socials
Getting outside
Saying yes to invitations and activities that fill me with energy (those aligned with purpose) and no to the those that drain me of it - this is my biggest growth opportunity right now
When my energy is good I’m better at home, which makes me better at work, and the reverse is true. I’m able to stay in flow more of the time, focused on what matters most, and avoid being pulled into things that don’t. Alive in the present moment. This feeling of presence and engagement creates a snowball effect that you want to last forever. You’ve reached a peak and you want to stay there, you’re in the zone, and you want to share it with others.
When it all goes wrong
Inevitably, something happens to drain the energy battery you’ve so carefully protected and deplete the reserves you’ve been able to share with those around you.
For me, that came recently in the form of two weeks on the road for work, followed immediately by a chest cold, and with it, a forced break from my training.
I should have expected it of course. Airplanes, late dinners, hotel beds, lots of hugs and handshakes often lead to a forced reset upon return to normal life, but I let the feeling of darkness wash over me all the same - forgetting all of the tropes I would share with others who find themselves in the same place.
“This too shall pass.” Yeah right, not soon enough.
“Don’t worry about it. Think of it as a much-needed recovery week.” I don’t need to recover, I need to get back to work!
“Rest, stretch, foam roll, and drink lots of water.” Sure, not gonna happen.
What did I expect? Did I think I was special? Somehow immune to becoming rundown and sick? My wife calls it a “man cold,” and deservedly so. My five year old daughter gets them too - we’re cut from the same cloth. Hers are at least cute. Mine? Not so much.
Systems online and needed perspective
A few days later now and the lights are coming back on in my brain, and my body is rested. The fog is lifting. I got back into the gym with a slight deload and felt good, and overall my energy levels are returning to where I want them to be. 80% today and betting on 100% by week’s end.
As I search for the takeaways here I first can’t ignore how quickly I let my mental game slip into that dark feeling of dread and despair. “It’s okay” is almost a mantra of mine I’m quick to share, but I forgot it so easily. More work to do there for sure.
What I’m thankful for however, besides feeling good again, is the forced perspective on what it feels like to have less energy, and with it, less of all of those attributes I’ve come to value in myself. It served as a lens into what my baseline used to be, of where I came from, and a reminder of why it’s so important to remain true to the practices that have helped me arrive at this new place in life.
Energy matters, and you can only give to others what you already have yourself.
Getting back in the game now and that feels good, and I’ve found a renewed sense of purpose on continuing to explore this topic further. Diet, sleep, exercise are all habitual now. They need refinement, but the practice is there and I’m thankful for that.
What’s next is deeper and has to do more with purpose and a decision framework related to focusing attention towards energy-producing action. Back to “saying yes” to the right things and realizing that saying yes to the wrong ones means saying no to things that may matter more. I just started this conversation this week with my coach, Fiona, so there’s a lot of work to be done, but I’ve at least realized the potential. More to come.
Thanks for reading,
Paul
Move forward. Stay in the game.